Although not everyone perceives orgasms to be the primary goal of having sex, it is undeniably an incredibly pleasurable and enjoyable experience. Still, some women find achieving it quite challenging, as, according to the research, only 35% of the female population can reach orgasm just from penetration. On top of that, around 10% to 15% of women cannot climax under any circumstances. In other words, the vast majority of women require additional stimulation to climax, whether it is from sex toys, hands, or tongues.
Nowadays, the subject of sexual life has undergone somewhat of a revolution, with female orgasm being one of its aspects that finally gets the spotlight it always deserved. And if your sexual partner is among the women who need some extra help to experience orgasm, both of you can benefit from learning about some of the best ways to reach it, make it last longer, and feel more intense. Read on to find some tips on how to give her the best orgasm using different toys and techniques!
Invest in Sex Toys
Various sex toys can prove to be incredibly helpful and help even the most demanding woman reach a more intense orgasm. One of the best things about sex toys is that these days, they are available in an abundance of different shapes, sizes, and materials. No matter whether you want to buy squirting dildos or try some bondage toys, you will not have to look too far. Of course, before you invest in any kind of sex toy, it is always wise to speak with your partner first. Do not try to surprise her with something she is not comfortable with.
While dildos definitely come in handy when you want to double the pleasure for your woman, you can also try more popular toys before considering other options. For instance, starting with a regular vibrator is always a good idea, as it allows you to stimulate the clitoris during penetrative sex. It also provides different rhythms, patterns, and intensities that are impossible to replicate with hands alone.
To make the most out of the vibrator during sex, start at a low setting, hold the vibrator, and press gently. Next, you can start moving it from one position to another and regulate the pressure. This is your time to try out different ideas and communicate what feels best, so listen to your woman and follow her lead. Keep in mind that the clitoris is incredibly sensitive, so you do not want to go too hard or too fast. You can also try giving your partner full control of the toy.
Try Different Positions
If you have been with your partner for a while now, you likely already have that one favorite sex position, but keep in mind that there are plenty of other options to try. Do not shy away from talking to your partner about her needs and feelings. Instead, team up and look for different sex positions that both of you would enjoy trying out next time you are having sex.
For instance, some sexologists say that when a woman is on top, it is the best position to enhance clitoral stimulation. She can also touch herself when riding you and experience a faster and more intense orgasm this way. But if you are both all about deep penetration, you can also try lifting her legs up or resting them on your shoulders. These positions may require more stamina than the ones you are used to, so take things slowly at the beginning and communicate a lot in order to establish what is most comfortable and enjoyable for both of you.
Use Lube
Regardless of what sexual acts you enjoy, lube is always an incredibly handy tool to keep near your bed. Not only does it prove to be tremendously helpful in reducing any uncomfortable friction, but it also allows both partners to engage in a wider range of positions and techniques in a safe way.
For instance, if you are trying to help her reach orgasm through anal play, it is recommended to use a silicone-based lube, which is thicker than water-based ones. However, keep in mind that it should not be used with silicone toys. For other acts, a water-based lube might be a better and more enjoyable solution. Additionally, a little bit of lube on your finger can make a world of difference when playing with your partner’s nipples, as it helps avoid irritation and can intensify pleasure.
Explore Fantasies
The key to intensifying your partner’s orgasm might also lie in her fantasies. Everyone has some, so do not be afraid to start a conversation and share what both of you dream about when it comes to sex. Fantasies can be an excellent way to increase arousal before and during sex and make your partner come faster than she ever did before.
Depending on your mutual preferences, you can opt for long-lasting, elaborated foreplay and come up with your own plot for the particular fantasy you want to try out or engage in something a bit more extreme. For instance, you can try slapping, gripping, choking, or even hair pulling and biting.
Keep in mind that before engaging in any BDSM-related activities, you should come up with a safe word and talk about your boundaries. For instance, she may enjoy choking but can draw a line at bondage.
Talk Dirty to Her
Dirty talk is not about being gross or crude or vulgar. Instead, you can try describing in detail everything you are doing to your partner and talk about what you want to do next, and what you want her to do to you. If you are hesitant or afraid to cross the line, you can also compliment her body and remind her how attractive she is.
You can also ask your partner to tell you what kind of dirty talk turns her on the most. If there is something she enjoys hearing, in particular, make sure to use it. Dirty talking can allow you to better understand each other’s sexual preferences which, in turn, might make both of you feel more comfortable and experience a more intense orgasm.
In Conclusion
Orgasms feel great and everyone enjoys having them, but you should not let them be the center of attention when you are having sex with your partner. When you put too much pressure on making sure that your woman reaches it, you can even end up sabotaging the whole effort. Thus, rather than making it the sole goal, try to focus on pleasure and communication more. This way, you can help her reach a more intense, body-shaking orgasm.
Whether you decide to buy some sex toys to use during sex, change your positions more frequently, use lube for different kinds of play, explore each other’s fantasies or try dirty talk, keep in mind that creating a safe environment during sex is just as important as arousing your partner. For most women, orgasms are all about the right mix of mood, excitement, and pleasure.